Lyrics: Krayzie Bone: Thug Mentality 1999: The Messenger (Skit)
The Messenger
Aw shit. Excuse me man, excuse me.
Waiter
Uh, yes sir?
The Messenger
Could you tell me where the payphone at in here or somethin’?
Waiter
Certainly. Back there by the wine racks.
The Messenger
All right, thanks a lot. Thank you, thank you.
Waiter
Oh, you’re welcome sir.
The Messenger
Shit. It’s a classy ass, muthafuckin’ restaraunt. Know this muthafucka got the money, punk-muthafucka. Shit.
Contact
Hello?
The Messenger
Yeah, hello?
Contact
What’s happenin’?
The Messenger
Yeah, I’m in the muthafuckin’ spot now, man…
Contact
He there?
The Messenger
… I don’t see nobody yet, but I know the nigga’ll be here. He got reservations.
Contact
A’ight, handle your business.
The Messenger
I think I see his broad comin’ in right now…
Contact
Right on time.
The Messenger
… So don’t worry about shit. I’m a handle this nigga, man. This nigga in a classy-ass, muthafuckin’ restaurant; I know this nigga got the muthafuckin’ money. Don’t worry about shit, I’ma handle it. A’ight?
Contact
No mercy, nigga.
The Messenger
A’ight.
Woman
Excuse me.
Waiter
Uh, yes ma’am.
Woman
I have a reservation. It’s for Jones.
Waiter
For Jones? Let me see here for a minute. Oh yes, Mr. Jones called. He said, he is running late, but I am to seat you now.
Woman
Okay, thank you.
Waiter
Follow me this way. Here you go ma’am. Um, would you like to start with something to drink while you wait?
Woman
Do you have a Chardonnay?
Waiter
Most certainly–coming right up. Oh, and uh, here is Mr. Jones right now. Hi, Mr. Jones how are you this evening?
Mr. Jones
Hey, what’s up? What’s up? What’s up?
Woman
Hi, baby.
Mr. Jones
Hey, baby. Damn.
Woman
Baby, what took you so long? I been just waitin’ and waitin’. This is a nice place.
Mr. Jones
Yeah, its cool. It’s cool. Did you order yet?
Woman
No, baby. I was waitin’ on you… Baby?
Mr. Jones
What? What’s happenin’?
Woman
That guy’s been staring at me since I’ve sat down.
Mr. Jones
What dude?
Woman
You know him?
Mr. Jones
What dude?
Woman
That guy over there.
Mr. Jones
Over where? Aw, shit!
Woman
Baby, what’s wrong?
Mr. Jones
Damn, don’t worry about it! Jus– Damn! Just– just be cool, just be cool.
Woman
Baby, he’s walkin’ over here now!
Mr. Jones
Oh, shit!
Woman
Baby, he’s– baby he’s goin’ in his jacket.
The Messenger
Message for Mr. Jones, muthafucka!
Woman
Oh, Shit!
Mr. Jones
Cover your head.
The Messenger
Punk muthafucka! Punk muthafucka! Fuck you! Get the fuck out my way! Get the fuck out my way! Fuck you! Get the fuck out my way. Get the fuck out my way.
Restaurant Patron
My leg! My leg!